Ever had a day you wish you just hadn’t started? Pounding headache, painful joints and a back so sore that you can’t turn far enough to reach for your cup of tea without wincing. Well I can tell you that you needn’t worry any more, introducing WONDRUG©, the wonder drug for all your painful needs. The patented mixture of new active ingredients works harmoniously to eradicate all of your daily aches and pains. The active substances chloroacetyl nitrouswondertate and ethyl sodium superate form a formidable tag team for making soreness disappear. There is no better way to free yourself from the shackles of discomfort ruining your life, take WONDRUG© for the perfect agony free existence (see below for list of possible side effects).
WONDRUG© 200 mg Tablets
Chloroacetyl nitrouswondertate 50 mg
Ethyl sodium superate 100 mg
Warnings, Potential Side Effects and Contraindications
Do not take more than 2 tablets in a 24 hour period.
Do not take tablet with less than four pints of water.
May cause swelling of the upper lip.
Do not eat three hours before dosing. Taking with food may cause explosive diarrhoea.
Taking for more than three consecutive days will cause bone stiffness.
Taking for more than five consecutive days will result in chronic joint pain.
May cause dizziness and sickness.
May cause migraines if taken before sleep.
May cause green urine.
May turn eyes orange.
If taken with vitamin supplements will turn skin purple in places.
Wash hands after touching the tablet, highly poisonous to animals and children.
Do not take if pregnant, over 34, under 32, are likely to come into contact with animals or children, work in an office, have eaten in the last three hours, are allergic to latex, are allergic to nuts, have chronic back pain, have frequent headaches or if are susceptible to hypochondria.
WONDRUG©, the one stop shop for all your painful needs.
Terms and conditions apply, the supplier is not responsible for any side effects which may occur from taking WONDRUG©.